The one where I Burn Bank

I have an addiction,
I like to frequently make the numbers in my bank statement drop

fact: In 2 days, I spent $240.00.

Its sickening, first its : please slide card, and with a flick of your pen/ stylus you walk out with a new shirt, jacket, shoes or scarf. Its nice, its empowering until your parents find out.

I'm making a statement where
1. no shopping till Black Friday
2. Eating out only OK once a week
3. $20 allowance in one week

I'm not blaming anyone for my disgusting spending, its atrocious. But is it a way we relieve stress? Do we feel better about spending the $3.25 for the Pearl Milk Tea than drinking it? I have no idea but making around $9.00 an hour and spending $70.00 on a jacket, man. Everytime i see that jacket, its full of sweat and that fake smile i put on when i see the person walk in to pay $5.00 for that smoothie.

If you hang out with me, don't let me give up the plastic.
Plastic kills.

The One where the stress builds

SATS, ACTS, AP Testing

Theses are all the reasons why we developed the phrase. eff my life.

Seriously though, EFF MY LIFE. In one hand I have SATS, in the other i have AP LIT,and in one ear i have my parents and in the other i have Remember Me- Deadmau5 going off.

Are we gonna be the generation that tells our kids... when i was kid, we didn't go fishing, we didn't go to the park. We had really intimate relationships with our TI89s and Calculus BC books. My best friends name was Barron's and my girlfriends name is Princeton Review. Sigh, pathetic.

Honestly, what are we getting out of this, why do we define the shittiest generation in the world?! I don't know but we definitely will not save the planet, we probably wont get world peace, we and might not live to see 65.

Dear College Admissions: Fuck you, you have no idea what you do to children, you deprive us of 18 years of our lives. Yes, at your school you develop an atmosphere for future success, however i can tell you, if this persists, there will be no future generation, Everyone will lock themselves in their rooms, sit with that one light and study into the night. Whether it be SATS or ACTS or AP tests thanks college. When the rejection letter comes, wish me luck in the future because you've ruined it.

Up until this point, Arrogance is bliss
Bliss is defined by intelligent people
Arrogance is intelligence.

The one with Forgive and Forget

Forgive, Forget, its a simple anaphora...

But does it really apply to daily life? Do we actually follow this rule? We do. Everyone has history, whether it be a date with that girl that is now a slut, or those issues with drugs, or that one time you cheated. Its history.

You see this cute girl avidly studying, and you ask her how she is. You find that shes really nice and cute. however, your friend looks at you with the most grotesque expression. she looks at you "do you know who that is?" and you shake your head cluelessly. Thats the girl that ***********. You act appalled and forget...her.

In all truth, we've all judged, as wrong and taboo as it is, we've all done it. Either what the fuck is she wearing, or why is he such an ass. Its not easy to forget, nor is it easy to forgive. Honestly I cant, every time I see the girl clinging onto another guy I think, 2 months max.

We all have history, the group at the top of the quad, we were the cool kids, the ones that hung out at the miller middle school flag pole. The ones that use to carry around AE bags, and the ones that used to gossip about others. The one thing that I cannot stand is, why are we so divided, why can we not be one? But then i figured it out, its history.

The One with Pain

Why has this always been an issue? Is this what humanity has come to? Can I advocate John Locke and his good belief of people? I don't understand. I tried and honestly tried to invest my trust like that stock market game. I believed that Google would have a gain, come on its Google! But slowly the earnings report comes and the $400 stock turns to ash.

I'm not mad, or actually I am. I don't know how I should feel. If I forgive and forget people take advantage of that. If I'm mad, I know its not my nature and with each cold stare, with each blinding disposition I think of the warm hug we could embrace. Every time I think I'm at fault, its my fault for going into your business, or is it fault for trusting you? Because you remember you have to earn it. I honestly thought that life couldn't be this complicated with you. I thought that we could talk the night away. I thought that we could just sit in Verde and stare off into space, but in the end it'll make sense.



Whatever. Ill get over it.
Who cares, it's just a fight
Its alright, it's just living fucking life.

The One with Moving Forward

At some point in life we have to take a leap of faith. Yes, haha a leap of faith. I don't mean to sound like your fourth grade teacher, but hey, shes there for a reason.

The leap of faith to say "I don't like what you're doing" or the one to say" Will you go to Homecoming with me?" but that's too cliche. We as people have to move on. but not be detached. This weekend was a sufficient opening up, meeting all these great people, hanging out with the "fuckbag"

I thought to myself, life can hand you lemons, but you don't have to take them. People can give you shit, but you are the only one that can make yourself feel inferior.

But I'm sorry. After six years, you've stood by my side. Through the tears, the stress, and the title of annoying-est thing in the whole world. You deserve better.

The One With the Attachment

Wow. I'm attached.
I have a C in AP Literature because of you. thanks.

However, in the sufferings of a Lynbrook Student, you have to jump through hoops and bend over for that one UCLA Rep. yeah. its college. But honestly I've worked so fucking hard to get where I am, each sleepless night represented by a pimple. Like a battle scar for conquering adversity.

People say "the closest friends you will ever have are the ones you meet in high school"...fuck that. The closest friends are the ones that have perseverance. Its a lion chasing a gazelle, the lion being sats, acts, SATII, AP tests, Grades, Sports. and you being the Gazelle. Your friend being the green pasture, the one with the green field and the flow of water. Its adversity.

a 4.0 for Davis is ridiculous, I don't understand what it is that makes college so hard. Is it the Asian immigration? is this the real baby boom? Don't Know. Its pathetic how i have to sell my club for "academic competitiveness" what about selflessness or even paying it forward.

Honestly, lets just pay it forward. to the old man that needs help with groceries, to the homeless man with the can of change, to the single mother with two jobs. People need to learn how to be people; I'm a strong advocate for fighting global warming, but our planet is polluted with conceit.

The One with Stress

So this article is on behalf of all 1600 Lynbrook Students. What the Fuck teachers. What the Fuck. Its bad enough to deal with a 2200 word study guide, but with a Lit quiz,+physio article+a 14 page stats exam. Nuff said.

But on a lighter note,
All its just life without expectations, we all expected senior year to be a breeze (yeah! one-oh) with a sick homecoming, with fun outings and cherish able memories. Honestly, this year is nothing. everything you make is for yourself, honestly high school is "self-made" Survival of the fittest.

But honestly I have had no senior year memories yet, just a blank canvas, Jackson Pollacked with stress, intimidation and remorse.